Vacation

I'm finally away on vacation...well, more like a staycation only at my parent's house instead of my own.  I'm just so happy to be away from Gainesville.  Today I get to see my mom whom I haven't seen in 6 months.  I'm SOOO excited!  I'm also going to be picking up my little cousin Gladys to have a playdate and sleepover with the kids.  Reagan and Gladys are best buddies so she is suuuuper excited.  And, my stepmom is on her way home with a Starbucks Mocha for me....yes!!

I apologize for my blogs lately.  They haven't been very positive, but I have chosen to use my blog to vent about things since I hate writing in a journal.  Typing is much better.  Not that everything I post will be negative, but you get my point. 

Anyway, Saturday, we took the kids to Sea World.  It was a blast!  Kris went with us, as did Shannon and Connor.  Every time we go, it's a whole different experience.  I think it's because they keep changing the theme to mix it up.  The kids got to to meet Santa...although they have no idea who he is.  I think we'll keep it that way.  They also got to see the entire Sesame Street gang perform Christmas songs.  Tristan completely lost it when he saw Elmo...he couldn't contain his enthusiasm.  And when bubbles and fake snow fell from the sky, he was completely thrilled!  It was great!  I love seeing things and experiencing things through their eyes.  It's like getting to go through childhood again, but without the drama of having to relearn life lessons.  Awesome!

Today I am typing from my dad's laptop in Tampa.  Kris had to stay home to work this week.  It's been hard not seeing him much this past semester.  With work and school and a lot of commitments, we just haven't had much time together.    (Although, we did get to share the amazing experience of the Home Makeover.)  It just seems like this past 5-6 months have been rough.  Tight finances, busy schedules, lots of demands....
Thankfully, however, our entire family has managed to stay healthy.  This year, we've watched many friends lose loved ones, struggle with illness in their families, and go through some really rough times.  I guess we all go through our own things.  I think that's part of the reason I am so thrilled to be out of Gainesville.  With so many people going through so many things, I feel completely disconnected from my friends.  I don't even talk to most of them except for a casual hello passing through the halls of the nursery or a comment on facebook.  And I hate that!  Even though logically, I know it's because we're all just dealing with SOO much, after a while, I start to think it has something to do with me, so I retreat and pull away and think it will go away if I do.  So, I go away. 

Although this season of life has brought so many blessings and joys (ie. kids, husband, etc) I have also found it to be one of the most lonely seasons in my life.  My friends just seem to have so much going on, like me, that I start to feel like I'm intruding or busying their life more if I pick up the phone to call them.  Even though, I love it when they call, even if I do have a lot going on.  It's weird.  It must just be my crazy female psyche combined with some sort of hormonal imbalance.

And until things get still again, I won't think about any of the formentioned.  So, now I'm off to start my day.  Time to shower and get dressed and head out to a day filled with family fun.